Okay, back to my driver’s license day. I am so not accustomed to wearing makeup either, and I spent extra time trying to apply it so I didn’t look like an old hooker trying to look young again. Have I told you I also haven’t worn much makeup in the past 29 years? Lipstick, I laugh at it as I chew it off as fast as I apply it, but I did promise some friends of mine I wouldn’t leave the house without it on so the last thing I put on my 51 year old starting a new life over again face, was lipstick.
I back out of the driveway and realized how strange the pedal felt on the bottom of my foot, I didn’t feel so connected and one with my car. I actually stalled out in the driveway and then I realized the problem, I was driving with heels on, that had to be the problem. I hit the street and cautiously creeped to the stop sign a few yards down the road and felt a bit surer of my footing. I turned left and started driving into a new comfort zone. I looked in the rear view mirror and didn’t recognize the person there and I didn’t connect with her either much like my foot and the gas pedal. It felt distant and foreign to me. I am not as sure footed as I have been these past 29 years. I have left the ground behind and am floating into my new life I guess.
I made it to the DMV and checked to be sure I still had some lipstick on my lips as I had chewed my lip in nervous anticipation all the way there. Why was I a feared of the DMV place anyway? I had everything they asked me to bring with me. The notary signed statement that I was Cheryl Renee Travis since they couldn’t accept the car title as Steve or Renee Travis, I had the dreaded death certificate so I could remove Steve’s name from the title too. I even had my proof of residence with a few forwarded envelopes as added ammo in case of emergency. I was fully loaded and prepared to wait for long hours to get all this done. I walked slowly into the facility, didn’t want to fall off my new heels, and took my number, 45. I settled in to watch the Jungle Book which was the movie playing on the TV to my pleasant surprise. I hadn’t seen that movie in years and it took me back to Guam when Steve and I watched it together at an outdoor theater night on base. I was disappointed when they called number 45 so quickly because I was really enjoying that movie and the reminiscing.
I was greeted with a smile and pleasant small talk as we dove into my business at hand. First the drivers’ license then the car tag so she could put my license number on the tag information. She also informed me I could register to vote there too. What a nice surprise. Of course I had to inquire as to whether she could find me a job also to which she was glad, I am sure, to say no. Everything went so smoothly as I was directed to the last counter to take my picture and pay the big money I was shocked to have to pay. I sat for a minute in that waiting area when the lady there called for Steve Travis. I immediately realized I had forgotten to give the other lady the death certificate to remove his name from the title. I informed the woman at this end of the counter of my error and she said no problem just to take it back down there and she would fix it for me. First I had to resolve the driver’s license part of my being there and take my picture. I stood with my back to the blue background and licked my dry lips and I was done. She handed me a voter’s registration form to fill out while I was waiting for the first woman to get back to me on the title. I was also handed my new driver’s license only to see my tongue sticking out licking my lips. I was so disgusted. I spent all that time in makeup and heels for my picture to come out like this. I slipped it into my wallet vowing to never get stopped by the police or carded (like that would ever happen).
Then I was called back to the counter to redo my title information. She was so nice and I shared my lovely new photo with her and she said “we can’t have that” and took it back to her supervisor who said I could retake my photo again. I was never so grateful. Who wants to have their tongue sticking out at a police officer at a potential I hope never happens traffic stop. The woman was so nice to me and understanding and it really felt like it was no problem for her and took a minimal amount of time to attend to the title repair. I was done in a matter of minutes, again. I went back to the end counter, paid my high tag fee and was free to leave.
So I got the pretty new tag for my car, the title out of my name, registered to vote and a decent driver’s license photo and I had the most pleasant DMV experience in my life. Walking cautiously back to my car with license plate in hand it started to hit me, and my emotions took over. I had another "this is real" moment. I broke down in the DMV parking lot as I realized that I had released Steve once more from my life, as I became a resident of another state, and I am driving in heels with make up on. Talk about out of my comfort zone. I am so far out of my comfort zone that I am driving like a maw-maw driver and it’s scary. It feels like I am speeding, but really I am barely moving and people are honking at me to go faster but I can only go this comfortable speed for now. I am beginning to get the hang of it though and may hit the fast lane one day, but for now I don’t care about being a slow cautious driver. I feel safe so get over it already. I am a Maw-maw driver in heels and lipstick, watch out I am driving as fast as I can.
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